How to Scrape a Pipe

We've all been there, out of bud and desperate for a hit. We've all stooped to the same lows; scouring the house for weed, smoking the stems, and scraping the pipe. None of these methods is very satisfying, and worse yet they are all a pain in the ass.

Scraping your pipe is the worst of the desperate options a stoner has. I have learned from personal experience that this can oftentimes end very poorly. Three of my pipes have been broken during resin collecting accidents, and considering how much a glass pipe can cost, this can be very disappointing.

Odds are, you're still planning to scrape your pipe, but before you do, let me say this; DON"T DO IT MAN! ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY?! No, seriously, don't do it, I have a much better alternative.

What You Need: -A glass jar large enough so that your pipe will fit inside
-Something to cover the jar
-A full supply for 99% isopropyl alcohol (Don't opt for the cheep/weak stuff, it will fail you)
-Another jar
-Some paper coffee filters
-A glass bowl (if it isn't glass or ceramic don't go there)

Ok, now if you have any inclination to use anything other than glass for your jar and bowl, don't. The process that you will be doing will not work well with plastics (and it could be harmful to your health).
What You Do

1. Put your pipe in the jar
2. Pour alcohol into the jar until your pipe is fully submerged
3. Put a lid over the jar and let it sit for at least a day

At this point you are probably thinking that I'm just fucking with you, but fear not, for the Guru doesn't do that kind of shit. I'm your friend remember.

Now that you have given your pipe a day to soak, the alcohol should look and smell pretty gross. This is good. Go ahead and pull your pipe out of the alcohol and rinse it off. Now don't get rid of the alcohol because you aren't done with it yet. As you will see, when your rinse your pipe out, the end result will be a practically new looking pipe. This is because alcohol is a strong solvent and a damn good cleanser.

Here is the best part, getting back all of that THC that was stuck to the inside of your pipe. If you don't know it already, THC is absorbed by alcohol and other solvents, so the THC that was in your pipe, is now in the alcohol.

Now, do you remember the bowl, coffee filters, and the other jar I told you to get? Of course not, you're probably stoned, that's ok, I don't frown on that, but you should probably read go get those things if you haven't already.

Go ahead and secure a coffee filter in your empty jar with a rubber band or some tape. Now slowly pour the alcohol that you used to clean your pipe through the coffee filter and into the other jar. This will ensure that the bits of soot and what not will be filtered out of the alcohol. After that, pour the now filtered alcohol into your bowl. Have you done all that? Good.

Now just go ahead and leave your bowl of alcohol in your garage or outside (away from the weather) and let it sit. Check back on it now and then, but it should be evaporating. On a hot day in the sun, it should evaporate within a day or two, otherwise a week or so. DO NOT BE IMPATIENT! DO NOT, AND I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH, DO NOT USE A HEAT SOURCE TO INDUCE EVAPORATION, YOU COULD BLOW YOURSELF UP. I said it, that's your one warning, if you burn your house down doing this, it won't be my fault because I told you not to do it.

Once all of the alcohol ( and I do mean all so don't be impatient) has evaporated you should be left with a black goo. It will be very sticky, and have the consistency of toffee. This is hash, use a razor blade and scrape up every last bit. Use it sparingly, it will get you plenty stoned with even the smallest quantity.

Enjoy!